One’s ability to love depends on one’s level of maturity.
For the immature person, love is also immature. It focuses on what I could GET or LOSE. Here are some characteristics:
a. Jealousy – fear of losing someone whom we value or meets our needs;
b. Envy – the desire to gain what others give in order to be happy;
c. Anger – the frustration or inner turmoil arising from one’s inability to control people and circumstances thus blocking what will make one happy;
d. Loneliness – the dependence on others to be happy;
e. Fear – when one imagines that needs and goals will not be met.
On the other hand, a HIGH LEVEL OF MATURITY makes one reach full potential of loving and living. It is based on the desire for others to gain – a selfless love so crucial for relationships to last.
This selfless love involves a lot of listening and perceiving which is only possible if one forgets herself.
Important Note: Doing things for others in our own way is a selfish and immature form of love.
Reference: If Only He Knew by Gary Smalley.
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